A Note For My Joey

Little Joey....
There are so many things I love about you.  Starting with your name.  Joseph.  You were named after PapPap and your name suits you so well.  I like that there are lots of variations.  Joey, Joe Joe, Joe Schmoe, Jozeppi, Joseph B. Smurflin, Joe Cool.  We like calling you different versions of your beautifully stable name.
Next, I love your fuzzy ears.  You have black hair all along the outside (and a little on the inside) of your over sized ears.  Another reminder of PapPap.  Your hair is gorgeous by the way.  Thick.  Black.  So so soft.  Your brother was bald until he was one.  I've never been a "Bald is Beautiful" type of girl so your locks have completely entranced me.  I want to give you a faux hawk.  I think it would suit you.
I love that your legs are all bow-legged and bent funny.  You like to tuck your knees into your armpits when you snuggle.  You look like a little boulder when you do that.  Perfectly rock-shaped. 
I like that you are becoming musical when you are nursing.  Every gulp carries it's own little tune.  And when you finish you let out one long sigh.  Like you are saying, "Ahhhhhhhh.  That was good." And you wiggle your little butt in real tight.  You seem so happy.  And I know all those smiles you give me are supposedly gas... but I don't believe that.  I think you're truly happy.  It's a big smile too.  Complete with dimples. 
Something about your face is very cartoon-y to me.  You have big big eyes and a pouty nose and luscious lips (especially for a boy) and it's all squished onto your little head.  Just looking at you makes me smile.
I even love your super buttery poops.  And I don't mind the fact that I have to change your diaper 12-15 times a day.  If you could work on only peeing on me half of those times... that would be great. 
You are a beautiful baby.  I just sit and look at you all the time.  I've come to the conclusion that you're perfect.  In every way.
If you could just do me one favor:

QUIT ALL THE BLOODY CRYING!

Kole is Two.

Official Birthdate: July 18
Celebrated:  July 18- 21.  The kid loves to party.  Or maybe he just likes singing "Happy Birthday" and blowing out candles.

Favorite color:  Green.  Everything is green.  Not in reality of course.  But if you ask him what color something is he says, "Gween! I like it!"

Favorite food:  Hot dogs.  He makes me so proud.  I also just introduced him to taquitos.  Big hit.  BIG hit.

Hobbies:  Trucks.  (<--- still.....) Blowing bubbles.  Well watching Ken blow bubbles.  Producing art.  His favorite medium to work with is stickers.  Pool parties with Triston.  Taking drives in the car.  If you ask Kole what he wants to do and the answer isn't "drive trucks" it will probably be, "ummmm.... take a drive?"  I love love LOVE it when he says that.  Car time is as close to being by myself as it gets these days.

Favorite person:  Dad.  Who Kole will occasionally call Kenner.  All day long it's "Dad?  Coming?  Dad?  Coming?"  Sometimes I want to sit him down and square off and tell him that I am important too.  I'm the one doin' all the work around here.  But you know?  Kole loves me.  Lots.  And more importantly, I love him.  Lots.  Adults shouldn't look to children for validation of their own lives.  Adults should give validation to kids.  Too often I see it going the wrong way.  Parents asking kids to love them.  It's against nature if you ask me.

Favorite word:  Poop.  I know it is not polite and it's gross and I shouldn't let him say it... but he laughs so hard.  He can be in the middle of a tantrum and if you say "poop" he starts laughing and dancing and being good again.


Lifetime goal:  Poop on the floor.  Anytime I take Kole's diaper off he runs away all nakey screaming "I poop on the floor!  I poop on the floor!"  Which he doesn't and he never has but he'll run away and crouch and just hope something comes out.  I thought... potty training?  Nope.  Hates the toilet.  Maybe I'll lay some newspaper out and pretend he's a puppy.


Favorite thing to say to Dad:  "Dad, I need you."  "Drive this one."  "Snuggle?"


Favorite thing to say to Mom:  "Mom stinks!"  "No cookies!"  "Eat your dinner!"

Can you tell who his favorite is?  And what I apparently say to him all the time?

My Conversation with Ken This Morning

Ken called at 9:00 this morning to check in on me and the cubbers.

Me:  K-o-l-e is being a p-i-l-l.  (We spell things that we don't want him to hear... don't all parents?)
Ken:  What's he doing?
Me:  Just ARGH!  Being too close.  Insisting on sitting on my lap while I am trying to nurse the baby.  Throwing fits.  Throwing toys.  Screaming.  Pretending he's going to give me a kiss and then screaming in my ear instead. (That would have taken a long time to spell out.)
Ken:  Oh... you'll be okay.
Me:  I know.  It's just going to be a long day.  (At this point some hormones took over and I got a little choked up.)
Ken:  What's wrong?
Me:  I'm just a little sad.
Ken:  Well, go get one.
Me: *sobs* What? *sobs*
Ken:  If you need a snack go downstairs and get one.
Me:  *laughing* I said I'm SAD not that I need a SNACK!
Ken:  *laughing* Well don't bother me if you just need a snack.  Geez!  I'm trying to work!
Me:  Why would I cry over needing a snack?
Ken:  Because you really like snacks.

It is going to be a long day... but at least I have this to laugh about anytime I think I'm losing it.

The Little Things That Go A Long Way After Having A Baby

• A compliment.  Whether it's about the baby weight sliding off, the latch of the new baby, my smile, my attitude... anything.  Oodles better than hearing how tired I look 100 times a day.  
• Mascara.  One quick coat and it's like being amongst the living again.
• A friend taking Kole for an hour.  Wow.  Talk about a  life saver.
• Showering.  I've successfully showered every day since the baby came.  Big improvement from when I had Koley.  Big improvement.
• Being outside.  It's been close to 100 degrees every day here.  But at night, when it's getting dark, it cools off into the 80s and it's a renewal.  All the "outside sounds" (including that stinkin', noisy, Air factory) drown out all the baby crying.  Even when their not crying.... I hear it.
• Phone calls and texts.  My sister, Victoria, called me 3 times before I called her back.  What a champ.  I love the feeling I get knowing someone was thinking about me.  My family and friends and even people I didn't know knew me... have come through and made Week One a very special one.
• Cookies.  Sorta make you feel good no matter where you are in life.  Same goes for Chocolate Covered Cinnamon Bears.
• A Percocet.  Keep 'em coming every 4 hours.  I think I'm the last remaining person on the planet who didn't know that Percocet is a drug that affects who your brain responds to pain.  It's not a pain killer as I have always thought.    
• Sleep.  20 minutes feels like 12 hours these days.

Joseph Blair arrived July 2, 2012 at 8:27 AM. 

The c-section was awesome.  The recovery sucks.
 Joey is wonderful.