Thursday, June 17, 2010

Coming Soon

The baby is coming soon. This is how I know.

1. I had a baby shower. That means the baby is coming soon.
2. Last night I got up 14 times to go to the bathroom. Ken swears it was over 20. I haven't done that since way back in November. We are running out of toilet paper-FAST! That means the baby is coming soon.
3. Out of the tons and tons of maternity clothes I was lended only 4 shirts and 2 pairs of pants still fit. I'm not saying fit as in I like the way they fit or how they look on me. Because they really aren't my faves. But they are the only ones that cover my stretchy, shiny belly. So I wear them. In rotation. That means the baby is coming soon.
4. I get contractions now. I think they are awesome. When one hits I am like, "Practice, Patty!" and I breathe and act all calm and collected and try not to tense up. I am such a pro at this. But contractions! Yippeee! That means the baby is coming soon.
5. My belly button is sticking out so far it has turned bright red and is so stinking sore. I know it's never happened before in the history of man, but I believe my stomach will be the first to explode and I will make history. Popped out belly button? Near-explosive belly? That means the baby is coming soon.
6. His nursery is done. Except for Ken touching up the paint on the ceiling. That means the baby is coming soon.
7. I have hobbit feet. I wake up a normal human and then by noon... hobbit feet. Not AS hairy as the hobbits- but still pretty fa-reaky. That means the baby is coming soon.
8. I keep thinking I see him. Ken set up a co-sleeper next to our bed. It's not attached yet but it's there and ready. It comes up to about 6 inches below our mattress. (Our bed is super tall.) Anyway I'll jolt up (not to pee) because I "heard the baby crying." Then I look over at his co-sleeper and swear he is in there or just was in there. Phantom baby appearances. That means the baby is coming soon. or that I am going a little nutsy
9. I can suddenly remember every word to every nursery rhyme and lullaby ever. I just tuned into that part of my memory and it was all there. I'm humming them all the time and practicing them. A week ago I couldn't remember Little Miss Muffett. Now, I can. That means the baby is coming soon.
10. I'm about the size of a corn-combine. That means the baby is coming soon.
11. I am ready, already! The fun-ness and excitement of being pregnant has (sadly) passed. It's no longer "fun" that I can't clip my own toenails or tie my own shoes. It's not "exciting" that I have to sit up to sleep. It's not "really cool" that I can't wear gorgeous stilettos. I miss you stilettos. I do. I do. I do. So, if I'm ready... That means the baby is coming soon.

Right?

3 comments:

Karlenn said...

I'm so excited for you, Pats!! Are you taking bets on the baby's arrival? I'm betting July 1st. I think he's cooked and good to go. I'm sorry about your belly button. I haven't ever had that happen. I always thought it was so cute that other women's belly buttons do that, but if it becomes SORE, then not so cute. And hopefully you'll have some time between quitting your job and having the baby to lie down a lot and get the poofiness out of those feeties.

Natalie said...

I like July 1st too, that is Bryce and I wedding anniversary, and by the way, you like concrations now you just wait little lady, waaaahaaaa, evil laugh, as I tap my fingers together!!!!!! Lunch next week sound good, sorry this week got away from me!!

megan said...

I'm excited for you too!!:) I hope he comes soon for your sake! I was thinking I'd guess July 3rd. I can't believe you're that close! I'm so jealous! LOL

None of my clothes really fit me either. At least all of my shirts and underclothes don't! I HATE it!!:P

You should post pictures of his nursery! I'm dying to see it!:)

Hope the swelling goes down fast for you. It never does for me. In fact, after the baby is born my feet get worse before they get better. Just a warning!:)