The Man Has A Sense of Propriety

Propriety (n.) conformity to established standards of good or proper behavior or manners.


 (There, Andi.  now you don't have to look it up.)
 
Kole is all of 19 and a half months old and his sense of propriety astounds (and annoys) me.  Although technically a toddler, I still call him a baby.  But, lately, he's been acting less and less like a baby and more and more like Mr. Manners.  That sounds really too nice.  More and more like Mr.  Everything-Has-To-Be-Just-So. 
 
For example.  Yesterday, we got back from Idaho Falls and played at the playground until dinner time.  All is usual.  Ken took Koley upstairs to change his diaper while I whipped up some noodles and sauce for the tyke.  Ken, in his fatherly wisdom, didn't put pants back on Kole.  Figuring bath and bed immediately follow dinner and why go through the hassle.  Let the kid run in his diaper for a bit.  Ken carries Kole downstairs in a diaper and a T-shirt.  As soon as Kole's toes hit the floor he starts crying.  Since he's our only child (and relatively spoiled) we both rush over to him.  "What's wrong?  What is it?  What do you need?"  Sobbing, Kole points to his legs and says, "Pants."  Really?  Yup.  He wanted to have his pants on.  He didn't want his chubby squeezable legs exposed.  Especially at the dinner table I presume.  One can't dine without pants.
 
Another.  Anytime I get Kole ready to go outside he starts chanting, "Coat.  Coat.  Coat."  Even when I tell him it's warm out and he doesn't need a coat. 
He responds, "Oww-side?" 
"Yes.  We're going outside." 
With raised arms and eyebrows he says, "Coat." 
So I grab a light jacket and help him put his arms through.  Figuring that's more than enough warmth for 70 degree weather.  I head for the door only to turn around to find Kole has not moved. 
"Come on, Koley!" 
 He stares at me for a few seconds (to be sure he has my attention) and then says, "Zip."
 
Let's continue.  Kole, like all babies, has a highchair.  It would be oh so oh so easy to put a handful of cereal or GoldFish on there with a sippy cup of milk and let him have a snack.  But not with Kole.  I set him in his chair and he chimes, "Snack?"  "Yup!  I'm getting you a snack."  And I reach for some crackers.  As I am pulling them out of the box and getting ready to place them on his highchair tray he starts crying, "No! No! No! No!" 
"What?  You don't want crackers?" 
"Bowl."
"You don't need a bowl to eat crackers."
"Pate."  (plate.)
"You don't need a plate to eat crackers."
"Bowl."
I try to conceal my eyes rolling and get him a bowl.
Why does he need a bowl to eat crackers?  I thought regular babies just eat stuff off the floor but not my son.  He wants to be in his chair with a bib on and his crackers served in a bowl.  I was lucky he didn't ask for a spoon or a proper table setting. 
He likes things "just so."  And he likes them done the right way.  He won't go outside in bare feet.  He likes his hair parted on the left side.  He doesn't like it if his clothes don't match (he just keeps staring at himself... like he knows something is off.)  He insists on being covered in a blanket if there is even a small chance he'll fall asleep.  Koley asked for rice, Ken made Quinoa, thinking Kole wouldn't know the difference.... time elapsed... Ken made rice.   Kole wants to wear a hat if it's sunny to keep the light out of his eyes.  He prefers his hands to be washed half way through his meal (as well as at the end) if he gets too dirty.  I'm expecting he's going to want fancy umbrellas coming out of his sippy before long.