Friday, May 4, 2012

Because Lists Are Easier

1.  I thought of another "moot point" I used to use.  I thought it was "On the Devil."  Not "on the double."  Example.  Ken would say, "Can you get me an Oreo on the double?"  As in super quick.  I heard- "Will you get me an Oreo on the Devil?"  As in the devil will cover the charge.  When I finally broke down (after being married for 6 years) and asked him why people say "on the devil"... I was extremely humiliated.  It has nothing to do with temptation or the devil picking up the tab.  At all.  As you all know.

2.  My sister, Victoria, is getting married in 2 weeks.  I have been looking for a shrug mercilessly for at least 6 weeks.  A shrug is a mini sweater- that covers up the fattest part of your arms.  Which is why I want it.  I need one in ivory or beige or a light light pink.  Do you have one I could borrow?  Or a link to where I can buy one.  Desperation in sinking in.

3.  Andi, the DJ at 26.9 The Fantasy Line, sent me this little gem-let yesterday.  The e-mail just said "You're Welcome."  Andi has been running her imaginary radio station since she was probably 9 or 10.  She'd sit in the living room and replay the intros to Air Supply's Greatest Hits until she had her intros timed to right when the lyrics started.  We were encouraged to "call in" and make requests.  Off that set of tracks I like "Lost in Love," "All Out of Love," and "Making Love Out of Nothing At All." I think her inspiration was Delila After Dark.  Delila was the evening DJ on Pittsburgh's Soft Rock Station: WISH 99.7.  I think Andi has honed the art.  Am I the only one who thinks it's funny that the station frequency is 26.9?  Which doesn't exist on a real radio dial.  And she called it The Fantasy Line?  But it is in no way similar to a 900 number.  Andi didn't know these correlations when she kicked off her radio debut.  But I'm glad she hasn't changed them in the last 15 years.


4.   I think Kole is back to normal.

5.  I'm really into Breaking Bad right now.  A couple of those episodes in Season 2 I had to sit out.  I have Post Television Stress Disorder and Walt was not helping.  But now that I have safely entered Season 3 through Netflix... I can't get enough.

6.  I just finished reading The World According to Garp by John Irving.  It was stunning and horribly sad.  And I feel like Garp is real.  Next in line?  Everything Is Illuminated by Jonathan Safran Foer.

7.  Last night I went out with my friend, Celeste.  We went sans kids.  We ate (I over ate) at Texas Roadhouse because Ken is too much of a food snob to ever eat there with me.  I ate 6 of those incredibly soft rolls with their cinnamon-y honey butter.  It was the perfect refresher.  We talked about new houses and old boyfriends and things that will get better and things that will get worse.  And we didn't talk about our kids at all.  Which was deeeeeelightful.

8.  I think I am putting on one pound per day.  I'm getting blimpy up there in front.  When I am pregnant I feel like as my stomach gets bigger the rest of my body gets smaller.  My face is thinner, my plump peach bum recedes, my legs are skinny and toned, my back has a beautiful curve to it.  I know it can't be true.  But when I look in the mirror.... I see it.  Oh yes.  I see it.

9.  Thanks, Beth, for evening us off at 65.


13 comments:

Juli said...

If I had more time I would make you one. :) We have Delia here too, I think, at least we did a few years back before I bought my car with no radio. Now I have a car with a radio, but don't go out after dark.

Bonnie said...

I LOVE Everything is Illuminated! It was my "E" book, movie and musical album. It's pretty heavy, though. Have you seen the movie? You can totally appreciate both b/c they are quite different.

Hope you enjoy it!

Beth Willmore said...

Holy cow I feel like such a rock star to get mentioned on your blog! :) I'm am laughing my head off about Delilah because we get her here in Idaho too on Klassy 97 at nights. Hilarious!
I'm glad your body is rocking hot and that you're slimming down everywhere but your belly, by the end with all 3 of my kids I looked like Shamu had washed up onto the beach and couldn't be rescued. My face and my stomach were the same size, seriously pretty.
You can e-mail me at willmoreb@ida.net if you want an invite to my blog, it's not as hilarious as yours, but real and dirty as life gets with 3 kids and a copy husband! :)

Beth Willmore said...

Oops - I'm super smart. I have a cop husband, not a copy husband...

DoublClik said...

Request line is open!

Natalie said...

Don't feel bad, you know that Christina Aguilera song Genie in a Bottle." There is a line that say "gotta rub me the right way." I have a friend who thought it said, "you better run before I break." It happens to all of us!

Kar said...

Heyyyyy, I ate at Texas Roadhouse yesterday with my folks!! I LOVE their house salad. I agree that you look amazing pregnant.

Come At Me Bro said...

This is great!

Jackie said...

Patty , I am just learning how to do this so forgive me if this is not the correct blog to respond in.
If you enjoy John Irving you should read " A Prayer for Wen Meaney"

Jackie said...

That is Owen Meaney ,not wen!

Misha Gericke said...

I love shrugs, but sadly I'm at the wrong end of the world to loan you one.

If you can't find a shrug, maybe a bolero will work too?

Lynn Proctor said...

oh i love the list thing you did!

Joshua said...

1. I'm tired.
2. My Red Bull addiction is back.
3. We were supposed to have a date night tonight, but the sitter cancelled this morning. :o(