Tuesday, June 26, 2012


My friend told me that a couple weeks before her second baby came her 2-year-old son went off the handle and turned into El Diablo.  I nodded and listened and in my head thought... I'm glad that won't happen to me.  Kole is too mellow.
What a bunch of BS I was feeding myself.  He has had a few shining moments in the last week.  There have been a couple times when his eyes sparkled and he seemed like hims good old self.  But the other 168 hours... *deep sigh*.... Heaven help me.
It is never stopping.
Let's start with the screaming, mmm kay?  It's like a tiger growling combined with an angry monkey mixed with a kitten getting stabbed.  It's so loud.  And, fortunately, nonstop.  So I have been given the opportunity to get used to it. I just haven't been able to.
Moving On.
Meals.  Today for breakfast Kole had hot dogs.  Don't judge, haters.  He had ketchup too... so there's some veggie sustenance.  I tried the toast.  With butter and jelly and peanut butter.  Heck- I would have put some GD sprinkles on that piece of toast if he would have asked me to.  No go.  Ended up on the floor.  Got the cereal out.  Nope.  And it's not just a "no" by the way.  It's a wail.  Like I just shoved hot pokers under his finger nails.  I offered fruit, granola bars, ping pangs (<---- pancakes), and finally I gave up. 
"What do you want for breakfast stinky butt?" 
"Hot Dog."
Then there is the violence.  He started throwing his toys.  Which I'm putting the foot down on pretty sternly.  Not a good habit.  But it seems like if he's not throwing a stuffed animal, train track, or truck, he's coming after me!  Fists a flying.  Feet a kicking.  Teeth bared.  I mean, he's probably not more than 2 and a half feet tall?  And he's weighing in at 29 pounds... but it's scary to be attacked!  He's ready to give me all he's got.  And it hurts!  He knows my soft spots.  Stomach and eyes.  Youch. 
I'd love to go into the sleeping that's not happening for anyone living here but I think it'll make me cry.  Some things just aren't funny.
There's the diaper changing.  He hates it all of the sudden.  3 weeks ago he was telling me when he needed his diaper changed and bringing me the diaper, wipes, and bumby cream.  Now... he dashes.  He hides.  He hits and screams.  And flails all over.  This morning I was wrestling him on the changing table and he kicked me in my chin.  I stumbled a little and he was trying to climb down.  I grabbed him (sorta forcefully I admit) and held him on the table.  He lifted his head and with the reddest face- screamed his highest loudest most aggravating scream at me.  In what I consider my absolute worst mom moment to date I said, "Oh yeah?  Well I don't like you either right now!"
Not so glad I stooped to that level.
Can't believe I lost it.
And in such a hurtful way.
I do like Koley.
He's just a big stinkweeder right now.
I shouldn't have said that and I felt horrible immediately.
I said I was sorry.
But neither my outburst or my apology had impact on the situation. 
The no's, screaming, and kicking continued.
And haven't stopped since.
That was at 8:00 this morning.


Anonymous said...

If you'd asked me 3 years ago, I would have agreed with you that a new baby makes a 2 year old do that. However my son doesn't have a younger sibling, and he lost his mind the exact same way. Good news, it's not the new baby. Bad news, it's just those damn terrible twos. At least, that's what it's been like here.

Juli said...

Honey if I had a dollar for every time I said that to Youngest, well... I'd be a 1%-er.

Course, this is largely due to his ASD and his over all persona in general, and not at all related to his welcoming a new sibling. Because as they have both told me, if I even think about it, they are moving out. :)

Lynn Proctor said...

awwww i am sorry--i hope it passes soon :)