Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Intrusion

I was getting ready to take a shower (read: without attire) and Kole walks into the bathroom.  I was surprised for two reasons.  1.  He was supposed to be with Ken.  Where was Ken?  2.  It's always surprising when a little person sneaks up on you.  Midget or toddler... same surprise level.
I said, "Go find Dad.  Mom is going to take a shower now."

Kole:  Are you taking a shower, Mom?
Me:  Yup.  Go get Daddy and build a train track.
Kole:  Moooom!  I can see your big boobies.

I blushed and grabbed a towel.
Why are you looking?  Why do you call them boobies?  They're not big.  That's gross.

Me:  Well... I am going to take a shower so... yup... I'm not dressed right now. Go get Dad, okay?  Ken?!  KEN?!
Kole:  There's your big stinky Mom Butt!
Me: (*Sigh.*  Self esteem just went from zero to negative ten.) That's not nice to say.  Go find Dad. (Kole doesn't know what an actual Mom Butt is.  But I do.  And that was a mean jab.)

I start to usher Kole towards the door.  Where's Ken?

Kole:  Mom.  You don't have a wiener.
Me:  Nope.  KEN!
Kole:  Oh.  That's sad.
Me:  It's not sad.  It's just different.  Boys and girls are different.
Kole:  What happened to your wiener?
Me:  I don't have one.
Kole:  Because you lost it?
I was so not ready to talk about all this.  He's two!
Me:  KEN!!

All day I kept thinking:

1.  Well!  Can't take showers while Kole is awake.  He's only 2.  But I was embarrassed all of the sudden.
2.  Do I have to talk about girls and boys and private things now?
3.  Doesn't the dad have that talk when it's a boy?
4.  When do you draw the line?  Now?
5.  Does anyone else have kids that walk in on them?

Am I over thinking this?  Is it different if you're a mom and your little daughter comes in? 



6 comments:

Chris Loves Julia said...

Greta and I frequently shower together so it MUST be different. Hahahaha

Kar said...

My kids still walk in on me CONSTANTLY. I've had the gender talk with them as soon as they've been able to ask me. Heck, Dylan asked me about sex when he was in KINDERGARTEN, and I was like, well, better he hear it from me than someone else... Sorry Kole said you had a mom butt. :)

Juli said...

My kids no longer walk in on me (thank GOD!) but I will say you handled it perfectly.

Yip. Girls and Boys are different. Clear and concise. As questions come up, either you or Ken can address them the same. Clear and concise, no extra information. :)

Coincidentally, I have a mortifying story about being walked in on that I'll share via email if you'd like. :)

Beth Willmore said...

Ok I am dying of laughter here! It's totally different with boys and girls because Meg will sometimes jump in the shower with me if we're in a hurry. She knows that's what girls look like, and she'll look like when she's older. She's not awkward about it and neither am I.

Now Parker on the other hand. Yeah, he and Meg haven't bathed together for probably 2 years now or so. He knows that boys and girls have different parts and it doesn't seem to bug him. He still showers with Jared occasionally.

When they ask I talk to them about it and I always use the "proper" terms.

Meg sees Mace during diaper changes all the time and it's no big deal to her.

I love it that he felt sad for you that you don't have a weiner though! You could have said, "No, I have a brain instead!" :) No offense to the dudes that read your blog, oh wait - a little offense!

Celeste said...

Ha ha!! Girls and boys are so so different. I think making it not a big deal is a good thing. Even though you are freaking out, they shouldn't because they don't understand yet. I remember when Kayson asked if I had a wiener. Chad told him it got cut off! Probably not the best thing to tell your son, but it was funny!

Poulsen Family said...

Happen to me all the time.